April and Ryan are Gettin' Hitched

LAS VEGAS -- Please meet 100-percent weapons-grade Cow. At some point there will be pictures and a semi-full recap of the bachelor party weekend (though Baer's not yet posted bachelorette photos, so maybe I should hold out), but for now let's focus on the Cow, capital C.

After running up something like a $360 bar tab at the pool at Paris on Saturday (easier than you'd think), dinner for the group of 13 was reserved at BOA Steakhouse, nestled gently in the side of Caesar's Palace, not far from where Pete Rose seems to be signing autographs in perpetuity.

On the menu, that piece of meat to the right is listed as Premium Japanese Wagyu. Price: MKT. MKT = $16/oz., "minimum 6 oz.," our waiter said.

Why so much? The Wagyu cow is well taken care of. It's raised in a mansion, given only the best beers and bourbons and massaged three times daily by Geishas in possession of the Orient's most flavorful oils.

Then it's slaughtered and shipped to the desert.

To the right you'll see 8 oz., of Premium Japanese Wagyu. That's $128 worth of Cow.

And it was worth it. Man, was it worth it.

I mean it was really, really worth it.

As for the rest of the weekend, here's a photo of my friend James holding a banana in front of the Eiffel Tower. That's pretty representative.


They came from far and farther last weekend. Some were sick. Some were in trouble with their wives. I can't thank them all enough.

Okay, two more photos. From Friday's tour of the Neon Sign Graveyard. On the left, my dad, me and my brother. On the right, the reason we were all there, sort of. Not pictured: My hangover. (Click on pictures for clearer images.)

OK, big deep breaths. We're going to make it. Six weeks til the wedding. Whitey lit out for Vegas this morning--a big weekend with the guys. This is good! The house is nice & quiet. I've got a little time to get things done.

Had a fitting today for the dress, it looks great. Terri didn't even flinch when I asked for some minor changes: a new color, different fabric, a silhouette like Monica Belluci...
Knocked off the new registry at Macy's (see links to the right for more loot links). (Note to self: call Macy's downtown and ask if they have a section of stuff that will help me clean everything I just registered for.)
Ordered our wedding bands--Whitey seems to be adjusting well to the idea of wearing a piece of jewelry.
The Talent Quest is lurching into Round 2. I recorded my entries today, more on that next week.

Best of all, our insurance company has approved my request for elective surgery. I'll schedule it as soon as we can find a compatible donor octopus who can spare me a few arms.

(whimper)

And I don't use exclamation marks lightly.

As many of you may know, Ms. Baer entered what amounts to American Idol, but for people who read the books that were assigned in high school and college. It is the Public Radio Talent Quest. They're looking for the next great public radio host. More than 1,400 people entered the first round, 10 continued on.

April's one of the 10.

Read all about it here.

Target has introduced a new line of wedding dresses. And ya know what? Not bad. Certainly not compared with most other off-the-rack stuff I've tried on this year. Prediction: David's bridal is going DOWN.

Whitey's employer, the Big O, is reporting today that State Senator Vicki Walker of Eugene has proposed a bill that will make it easier for newly-married men to change their names. And that's what's nice about living in Oregon. Because I know Whitey really won't feel we're a family until he's surrendered his identity to mine. And really, he's doing it for the kids.

In other stories we're following... the rehearsal dinner's coming together nicely00looks like we'll be having a mass picnic at Goodale Park--all early arrivals are welcome! first fitting for the bridal rigging is this Wednesday! We're flying out Thursday afternoon so Whitey can meet my Cleveland mafia. Back at Michigan Control, Whitey's cousin Lisa is in final stages of prep for her wedding (we think Diane & Alice deserve a trophy for dealing with both of us this summer). And something very big & exciting is threatening to divide my attention to wedding planning. (Bad bride! This is supposed to be the center of my existence, right?) Watch this space for updates!!!